"All, everything I understand, I only understand because I love."
Leo Tolstoy, born to a Russian family of nobility. His ancestry is traced back to a Lithuanian noble Indris (I mention this because I was born in Lithuania). To say he was an influential writer would be an understatement. His work still carries weight to this day.
But this is not what this post is about. The quote is a sound opening for this topic.
We have all experienced it at some point in our life, whether it's with a spouse, a family member or with your material possessions.
Yes love comes in all varieties.
I read a fantastic novel The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman. His theory is such that we each have a language that we feel the most love from. For example if you love gifts than the person who buys you a gift (Language: Gifts) you appreciate them more than if they mowed the lawn for you (Language: acts of service).
It is a must read for relationships. I gave copies to many of my friends who are in relationships. Unfortunately I have not got any feedback from them, but I trust that they have taken in the wisdom Chapman conveys to us.
Everyone has their own way of acknowledging love. Everyone's experience is unique. Like my friend said to me today, you can read about it in a book but you will never feel what it feels like until you have it.
One must distinguish between being in love and being in a state of infatuation. It may feel like love when you are in the latter stage, however there is a distinctive difference. Lust is having a hard time keeping your hands to yourself. Love is taking responsibility and being empathetic.
Love, a double edged sword that can take you from one extreme to other. It is so powerful that it can make us feel so good, and it can hurt us so deeply.
Have you ever experienced the pain of a loved one passing or leaving you? It feels like your heart is shattered into a million pieces. It turns your world upside down. You become so negative and cannot appreciate anything.
So should you not love than to avoid this misery? But then you would have missed the immense joy it brings.
We cannot find love in any specific part of our body. The heart does not hold love, so why do we associate the cliche of drawing a heart to symbolize love? Possibly because our body reacts with stimuli (heart pounding, your body sweating) when we are confronted with a certain situation. But that's not love, that's excitement and fear.
Love is not in your brain either. So where does love come from? Is love real? And if it is than how can we prove it? Where is the science behind it?
Does everyone fall in love? Can we for certain say if you do A, B and C you will be in love or be loved?
These are all questions for another post.
Love feels real and magical and unexplainable. Just like consciousness.
What you choose to do with this information is up to you.