What is self awareness? Can self awareness be trained?
Does self awareness make oneself remarkable? What steps can one take to become
self aware?
You have heard me advocate self awareness through
various posts. In fact, it is one of the strongest aspects which a leader should
posses. The paradox is; until about a year ago I noticed I was lacking this trait,
only then I recognized I was actually constructing this. How did this happen?
Why did this happen? How has it improved my life?
All great questions to consider on such a deep topic.
You may be wondering what is so important about self awareness. Those of you
who are asking that are not self aware or have not found value in self
awareness.
First let’s examine what self awareness is. According
to Wikipedia; self awareness is the ability to recognize oneself as an
individual separate from the environment and other individuals. It is not the
same thing as consciousness, the difference is in your awareness of being aware
of the environment and others.
Okay, maybe that is a bit deep so let me deconstruct that
for you.
Being self aware means that you can restrain yourself
before you react to any situation. It means you can step aside and question
what is actually happening. Having an inner dialogue about the situation.
Self awareness is understanding how others feel, and
how your actions impact everyone and everything around you. It is reciprocating
a kiss to someone and being aware what the other person likes. Knowing why your
grateful for the things your grateful for. Understanding the root to your happiness,
and how to replicate it.
Creating the right environmental conditions in which
you are most productive.
I get cranky if I don’t eat something for a few hours.
My best and most productive time is about 30-45 minutes after I eat something.
Self awareness is finding the connectedness between
your habits and their results. Knowing the amount of sleep you need to be well
rested and effective the next day
Your limitations and possibilities. Studying the sub
context of a current situation.
When I walked into Lush yesterday, a soap company, I
asked the store clerk why two bottles of the same kind of soap were a shade
different color. She hastily made the assumption that one of the bottles had
more of a particular ingredient. I asked her why she thought that.
She looked at me in awe, and couldn’t give me a
reason. She said “I never even thought to ask why.”
From that experience I took away three lessons:
1) When
someone makes a claim about something first ask yourself if you agree or
disagree with it. Then ask why, was it because they hold an authoritative or
friendly position, or was it the power of suggestion or social influence at
work?
2) People
make assumptions yet they don’t consider why they make them
3) If
there is truth behind what is said, whose truth is it?
As you can see here that taking into consideration the
things you are observing everyday and questioning any assumptions you may have
is one step towards become more in tune with yourself. That is what self
awareness is primarily about.
I keep a daily learning journal. What do I mean by
this? Everyday I write down timeless lessons that can serve me at any point in
my life.
Everyday there is something that you will learn. This
may sound like a total cliché. I promise you it is true. The only way to
actually discover the lessons is if you are actively seeking them.
Okay, so that’s just a few examples of self awareness
and how it has helped me, I am sure by now you are starting to get the picture
as to what self awareness is and how it can serve you. Let’s see what others
are saying about it.
Inc., Fast company, Forbes, Entrepreneur and many
other prominent publications sensibly elucidate how important it is to have
self awareness and not having it could mean the end of your career. In fact,
people are said to be narcissist who lack self awareness.
“A real narcissist is dissociated from his or her true
self.” Drs. Drew Pinsky and S. Mark Young.
In the article published in December 2001 in the
Harvard Business Review written by Daniel Goleman, Richard Boyatzis, and Annie
Mckee titled Primal Leadership; The authors conclude that:
“Bringing
them into awareness was a crucial step toward changing them. As they payed more
attention to situations while listening to a colleague, coaching soccer, or
talking on the phone to someone who was distraught- all became cues that
stimulate someone to break old habits and try new responses.”
This excerpt from Inc. magazine, Ilya Pozin founder of
Pluto.tv says:
“If you are never pushed to the point where
your weaknesses are exposed, you won't ever have the opportunity to become
stronger. Same goes with your ideas and plans. Instead of trying to lead others
to support your answers and decisions, ask them to prove you wrong.”
Self awareness is one of the cornerstones for emotional
intelligence, which will require a whole other topic of discussion, maybe two.
EQ will prevail and will be more important or actually is becoming more
important than IQ in todays business environment.
I am not perfect, I will never be perfect, news flash neither
will you. But we can do our best to be great. Work on your self awareness and
observe your life flourish.
How can you become more self aware?
Begin by asking yourself some questions:
How do you feel right at this very moment?
How would you feel if your best friend befriends
someone you dislike?
In what condition or situation are you the happiest?
What are your strengths and weaknesses?
If there was one thing you could do for the rest of
your life, what would that be, and why did you choose it?
Thank you for reading this post. I will be writing
more about this topic because I feel there is more value I could give you.
Until then, drop me a comment and let me know your point of view on self
awareness.
To be continued….
Originally published in Karasingroup.com
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